The Beginning of the End?

So I become more and more convinced every day that this isn't for me. I know I've only been on the job for 6 weeks, but I feel in my gut and my heart and my head that this is not the right career for me.

I spent a lot of the weekend dreading Monday, crying a lot, venting to friends and family, and just generally being miserable. Tonight, I had a friend help me grade tests for an hour and a half, and then I cried a lot more. Bleh. My mother is convinced I should be on anti-anxiety and/or anti-depressant medication. Though I beg to differ, I haven't entirely ruled that out yet. :(

I was SO CLOSE to going in tomorrow (Monday) to just quit... to just go into the Principal's office, throw my hands up in the air, and say, "I'm done." However, she and the superintendent have been kind in offering me an out in December. I'm trying my best to make it until then, I really am, but it's hard waking up every day and being miserable... especially when you're miserable because you're working the job you've dreamed of doing for most of your life. It sucks.

Anyway, I called in sick tomorrow, so I'm at school, having just finished writing up my detailed sub plans. I feel better now, and I'm trying SO HARD to stick this out until December... we'll see. I thought I was stronger than this, but I'm just completely overwhelmed and burned out already. I'll probably become another of the hordes of people to end up quitting within the first 5 years (heck, the first 5 months!). So that's that.

For now, I go home and try not to think about school. Hopefully, I'll be back in action and ready to go on Tuesday. I sure hope so!